Friday, December 08, 2006

Guns N Roses Concert Review...AKA

So Guns N F'in Roses.

I went to the last canadian tour, in Edmonton Last night. What follows is my review/ description of the of the evening. Each section will get a new heading...the special thing about these headings is they were all alternate titles for this post/review, but there was just so many of them. Enjoy...

So I got free tickets to the Guns n roses concert in Edmonton Via my kick ass job at a radio station. After a bit of a struggle i was able to contact my one friend that lives in Edmonton.

After work on Thursday I drove to the city, met up with my friend and we headed to the show shortly after. Now we were aware that the show was going to be long, and run super late, but there was a reason for getting there early.

Enter sub title one.

* Dissapointing Naked Girls*
The very opening act of the show is the suicide Girl Burlesque show. For those unfamilier with the suicide gilrs..its a web site, where females of the goth culture congregate, share racy photos of themsleve decked out in the latest in goth fashion, talk about death and all that..or at least thats what it was before the cooperate machine got a hold of it...needless to say I am a fan...I love beautiful women and i have a thing for goth chicks. Now dont get me wrong the show was great, som very talented girls., one girl was doing some crazy tallented stuff with a this isnt a dirty thing, just spinning it in amazing fashion.
The girls were all hot, doing a number of quick outfit changes, and dancing. one bit involved girls in stewardess outfits, dragging luggage behind them..when lo and behold another girl unfurlas herself from the non to big piece of travel ware....the finale involved bikinis, bottles of chocolatte syrup and plenty of sticky girl on girl T and A chocolatte smearing...this was not as "sexy" as perported (is that the right word?)...really, just messy....but the dissapointment comes from the fact that although very attractive, non of the girls were all together "goth" If i am promised goth, and expect goth, and dont get goth..well you get the idea.


i dont acctualy have a sub title for this part cause we pretty much ignored this act and chatted.
The first musical act was a band called Helmut...while having heard good things about them, they really just sucked live..maybe they are better on the albums, but thats it..noithing else to say...ater they played for half an hour ..9-9:30, there was a 30 minut intermission


* That Sebastian Bach has a dirty dirty mouth*

This part of the show was phenominal, Sebastian was full of energy, national pride and entertainment and it all spewed forth from his form...along with an unending tirade of vulgarities and F bombs the likes of which i have not seen for a LONG time.

everything was puncuated with swears, he said many great things , just interupted by the swearing alot. my fave parts i think where he did a whole "i know, that you know that i know that you know bit, about canada kicking ass and being responsible for Sebastian bach. the other fave was when he talked about the reality TV super group.he syas somthing along the lines of...
"you remeber that episode that i said i quit drinking?...I F***ing lied (with wahh wahh wahh music) no one tells me F***ing drinking aint good, i can drink a F***in labatts F***ing blue whenever the F*** i F***in want to"..and then went on to screw up an insult aimed at ted nugent...all in all Sebatian Bach was F***in kick F***ing Ass. (now for 1 hour intermission)


GUN's N ROSES - takes to the stage..aka...axl rose and some fucks play some GNR songs

The show was great, let me just clear that up..besides it problems, i so enjoyed this show.

So Axl and current crew took to the stage at 5 to 12..thats right the acctual show started at midnight.
(this is all out of order, i'm just going to type it as i remeber it)

they played a couple songs, the the one guitarist got a 10 minute guitar solo....and it sucked....this guy was hairy, and big beared, dressed like an idiot...and his guitar playing skills basicaly involved fast moving fingers makeing a shit load of noise...seriously this guy made me so angry through out the show...i am pretty sure with a cheapeffects pedal and a cheap guitar i could play to a calibre equal to this SHITE.

and one point axl is singing and he stops dead, leans over , and sya, hey...turn the fucking music down, bring it down, and turn some lights thinking oh shit, whats going on, is he gonna freak and cancel the show? tells everyone on the floor to settle donw, and take 2 giant steps back cause people at the front are getting crushed and hurt...that was so fucking cool of him.

The show continues, another guitar solo, this time from bumble foot...thats right his name is he is acctually good at playing guitar and made some of the good kind of nise...but then he started playing oh canada...and it was fucking terrible...there was no way i was standing for that shit.

They play lots of great classic songs (song idiot in front of me swooned when they started playing some of them) and they played a large number of new ones.

there was a bornig ass pianon solo form some no name.

The was a differant piano solo from axl theat led into november rain which was sweet.

near the end Sebastian Bach joind them on stage for a song which was awsome, then Bubbles from trailer park boys came out to a near standing ovation...for which i sat down..and they played liqour and whores (??)

there was one encor and then we booked it at 2:30 in the morning...thats right it was a2.5 hour set...HOWEVER

*so good, so needlesly long and full of filler*

2 10 minute guitar solos
2 10 minute piano solos
and inbewteen each song about 1-3 minutes of filler

easily an hour worth of f filler at this bloody concert.

a few points to critique

When axl was good he was freaking awsome. seriously i dont know what he's been doing since his terribel attempt at shows in 99/2000, but this is like night and day...he rocked....mostly

There were times in the show that you couldnt really hear what he was saying, which led to my theory of


Somtimes it seemed that the music got turned up and Axls mic got turned down...he was still singing, but you couldnt quite make it it was like...he cant really do this part/song very well anymore, but its live, so we can hide it with noise, so no one can tell.
there were times where he very well could have just been mumbling the tune rather tahn singing.

and the biggest thing that my friend and i noticed...


Axl ran off the stage at least 25 times througout the show..for apparently no good reason.
he occasionall came back witha differant jacket, or shirt, or returning with a previosu jacket. each of the se random dissaperances took 2-5 minutes...far longer than need to change a shirt...what was he doig back there? another line of coke? getting his clockwork motor rewound? geting a tease of a BJ from a suicide girl? one happend so many times...we would be wathcing, turn to each other to make a comment, turn back and BAM "WTFIA"

this also added to the length of the show needlessly

every time he left, i wasnt sure if he was coming back, thought maybe it was the old axl coming out and he was endingthe show early for some unknown reason.

the crowed stood and cheered for the old songs and basically sat down and watched for the new stuff...not that it was bad, its just not a good idea to play new music that nobody has ever heard ..(a couple track are okay)..the problme is, most of the time people cant understandf what you are singing at a concert cause it is so loud and the settings are not ideal. people can only sing along because they already know the words.

they didnt play a song i was hoping for...the rolling stones cover sympathy for the devil. but they did play live and let die, which was sweet enough i said the show was great..just very long..and i am soooo tired...i'm working on 2 hours of sleep in the last 33... axl has been rejuiced, and kicks ass...even if he is still super fucked...I look forward to the album...if it one day graces shelves of music stores around the world....I recorded most of the old songs at the show, audio at least..i will be puting them on my computer and seeing if any of them acctually turned out..heres hoping anyway.

thats about it...this is long enough,,,thanks for bearing through it.

the rest of the night ws uneventfull...except for getting lost on my way out of that stupid city

untill next time...


Blogger m.bradford said...

Awesome - its like being there ... in a dark room with white writing. I should totally check out these 'suicide girls' and see what they're all about. As for that jackass guy from that mega-band reality show ("Nuts McGee" I think his name was) , he can poop himself. He reminds me of one of those highschool greaser jackasses who stumbled into fame. Ok..wait...yep, I'm jealous

4:11 PM  
Blogger Attention Whore said...

this is funny, one of my friends went to concert in Calgary and had THE EXACT same things to say about it. Right down to the 10 min solos and the mic volume...funny.

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